Do Things That Make You Uncomfortable

Doing things that make you uncomfortable is the name of the game. Now, I'm not talking about doing something of questionable repute or things that put you in dangerous situations. I mean pushing yourself to expand your horizons, which have shrunk due to the Beast that is suicidality. Fighting the Beast is more difficult the more your world shrinks (and the world shrinks proportionately to you not getting out of the house and/or avoiding other people).

So now that I've told you what I don't think you should do, and what circumstances to avoid, here is what I mean by telling you to "do things that make you uncomfortable." While the sense of discomfort can signal us to be wary and careful – it is just as true that sometimes being uncomfortable means you are in a period of growth. In this post, I am referring to the latter – the times when we are expanding our horizons.

I have a history of trauma, so "expanding my horizons" can look and seem terrifying. If you have trauma, the unknown can appear to be impossible. Don't give up – experiencing new things and pushing the boundaries of your comfort zone – will ultimately help you avoid remaining stuck. If you have trauma and want to better your situation, doing exactly what makes you uncomfortable is what you need to do to make progress.

So, what do I mean by "doing something that makes you uncomfortable?" Here is an example: I was terrified of movie theaters for the longest time. I didn't like sitting at the front because of all of the people behind me. I didn't like sitting at the back because I wasn't near an exit. (In the middle, quite honestly, it made me anxious as well.) Crowds freaked me out, and I generally only saw very popular movies, so crowds were indeed an issue.

I tried going to the movies after taking a PRN (an as-needed medication), but then I'd be knocked out, which begged the question of why I was bothering with seeing a movie in the first place. I tried going at off-peak hours, so crowds weren't an issue. Honestly, I tried everything I could think of, and nothing worked. I finally gave up.

I didn't go to the movies for a long, long time. Finally, I mustered the courage to see a movie. I wanted to see a particular movie on the big screen (I'd had numerous people tell me to see it in the theater). The theater that a therapist recommended to me had "pods" where you weren't sitting very close to anyone, and I was in the vicinity of the exit. I was starting to have a panic attack when I remembered to BREATHE to quiet my anxious mind and body. I inhaled and exhaled slowly and intentionally. And guess what?? I made it through the movie in one piece. I didn't have to leave in the middle of the film, and I sincerely enjoyed the movie!

Do what makes you uncomfortable. You may not succeed the first (or fortieth) time; it might be difficult, and it might make you very uncomfortable. I'm not talking about pushing too hard, just hard enough to push the envelope and begin to see and feel some change – remember, Rome wasn't built in a day!!!

I'm not suggesting you push yourself so hard that you panic or regress. I'm merely encouraging you to take something where you have become avoidant and work on it. Try taking baby steps; you will want to work on something that is NOT something that causes you to have a panic attack!!! Try starting with something you avoid that is low on the stress scale. When I met my fear of movie theaters head-on, I made strides with other less loaded situations. So, go forth and conquer – you've got this!